Shut Your Pie Holes… and Eyes. July 25, 2009

Random thought of the morning: we spend so much – too much – time looking at computer screens, tv, movies, video games, blah blah etc etc you get the point. But, the universal reaction of humans (and even a lot of animals) is to CLOSE THE EYES when something is awesome to the senses other than sight.

Think about it.

Amazing smell of your favorite dish – close your eyes and inhale.
Wow-wow taste of favorite dish – close your eyes and drool.
Smell of the ocean and feel of the sun – close your eyes and lay back on the beach.
Getting a massage – close your eyes and drool.
Embrace of a loved one – close your eyes and… please don’t drool while returning it.
Hearing great music – show me one concert where there’s not people with their eyes shut swaying or dancing

Maybe with so much attention to being completely “visually steamrolled” in our culture, our souls still realize the need to shut off our vision in order to get some other type of memory. And maybe we don’t realize it, but we remember better with our other senses.

What is our vision but one fifth of our possible interaction with everything in our world? (…and outside it?)

I don’t know about you but I’m going to go smell some grass and feel a book in my hands today. So long.

Bad Poetry Tres July 21, 2009

7. Mr. Treeface

Hey Mr. Treeface,
Dearest Mr. Treeface,
Thou livest outsideth my window,
Sneering on these summer days
“I am outside, Captive Human!”
Fine, great, good, whatevereth,
Laugheth thyself well now,
For the last laugheth I shall have
Come this winter’s ninety-three inches of snoweth.

8. There is a Beeping

There is a beeping,
Four times it beeps.
There is a beeping,
About every four seconds.
Four beeps each four seconds
Four beeps each four seconds
Four beeps each four seconds
Four beeps each four seconds
Four beeps each four seconds
Four beeps each four seconds
Nevermind, it stopped.

I Painted Again July 14, 2009

Natural Bar Code

Squares I Want On Everything

and Laughter Circles.

Bad Poetry Part Deux July 9, 2009

4. The Wind

The wind whispers
shhhhhhhhhhhh
Like I am some untrained child
Picking my nose and babbling
During the philharmonic concert.

5. My Adrenal Glands

My adrenal glands, they sit
hither on top of my kidneys.
My adrenal glands, they work
….. a little.
My adrenal glands, they are sad
because I have been drowning in stress for years.
My adrenal glands, they like yoga
specifically long back bends.
My adrenal glands, dear adrenal glands,
I hope we will be friends again,
because you two are pretty freaking essential for life.

6. Woodchuck

How much wood
could a woodchuck chuck
if chuck was even an appropriate verb to apply to wood?

Bad Poetry July 7, 2009

I am not a poet. But I get a really good laugh out of bad poetry. And since I have a blog, and am blogging on said blog, I obviously have some time on my hands to make, oh… say… bad poetry?

1. My Life

My life is like a
s  c  a t     t e  r
of bones
laying about
as if
to remind me of
that time,
that time when
my brother
DEMOLISHED
some crappy thing I built
out of U n  sT  urD    Y
materials.

2. Bad Poetry

I have something to say, for I am mad.
Who is to say that a poem is bad?
A poem is but a spout of happy or sad.
So if rhythm or meter I have not,
Is this prose that I’ve got?
“Maybe,” you say? Well, thanks a lot.

3. Ode to Legos and Fig Newtons

Oh sweet colorful box,
Ones, twos, threes, fours,
And the double-rows with your fatness,
What shall we build today?
You tell me, please,
For I have the
—PONY—Attention span
of a —SHINY— small gnat-like
flea-intelligent —HOT PANTS!—
…
Forgive me, I have forgotten why we were talking about fig newtons.

Hey, WordPress July 1, 2009

How about you stop adding widgets to my blog, eh? I don’t want to have to come here all the time and keep removing them. There were FOUR unauthorized ones today.

I will never Twitter, so don’t even add that to my page without asking thanks. I was offended by that one.

And why will I never use Twitter? I could go on for years. But this Statshot from The Onion sort of sums it up.